Ask us anything part 3
- Thread starter LC18
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That is really an interesting topic.
What is a hobbyist and who thinks of themselves as a hobbyists.
I personally don’t even like the name and certainly don’t consider myself that and hope the ladies I see don’t either.
To me a hobbyist is someone who sees as many women as possible and most often for an hour or less.
A guy who is more interested on being able to put as many notches on his revolver as possible and finds gratification and to be able to boast about how many women he has slept with. I never really understood the attraction or the need for this.
While I probably spent more time with an SP than most, this year I have seen basically 2 women the whole year and one in a duo once with one of the 2.
I like and care about the women I am seeing and we are friends not just SP/client I have known them for years and consider myself lucky to have such caring and kind women in my life who are total sweethearts and so nice to spend time with.
I feel like clients came up with the expression ''the hobby'' and call themselves hobbyists.. I'm not a huge fan of those terms.
And while I don't think it's a bad thing for someone to see many SP's, some of us refer to a certain type of client as hobbyists.. And yes, it's clients who are very demanding, try to get more for less, book short periods of time, see many SP's, complain about things like rates and boundaries, and love writing reviews (that are often negative or extremely explicit)... They are treating us like a product to be sampled rather than a human being.. and they use a certain language. (''ymmv'', ''no repeat'', ''gnd'', ''the menu'' etc lol)
I don't think most clients think of seeing escorts as a hobby, but a lot of men on review boards and reddit do... It's a certain way of perceiving the experience. If someone who wasn't a client of escorts told me it's his hobby to have sex with different women he doesn't get to know I would find it pretty disturbing too lol ... there's something dehumanizing about it.
And while I don't think it's a bad thing for someone to see many SP's, some of us refer to a certain type of client as hobbyists.. And yes, it's clients who are very demanding, try to get more for less, book short periods of time, see many SP's, complain about things like rates and boundaries, and love writing reviews (that are often negative or extremely explicit)... They are treating us like a product to be sampled rather than a human being.. and they use a certain language. (''ymmv'', ''no repeat'', ''gnd'', ''the menu'' etc lol)
I don't think most clients think of seeing escorts as a hobby, but a lot of men on review boards and reddit do... It's a certain way of perceiving the experience. If someone who wasn't a client of escorts told me it's his hobby to have sex with different women he doesn't get to know I would find it pretty disturbing too lol ... there's something dehumanizing about it.
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It’s about respect and good company and having someone comfortable with your fetishes I find!
Not all clients have specific fetishes. But yeah, I think seeing escorts should be a way to fulfill a need and take care of yourself in a respectful way.
I have many and it’s so much fun! Kinky women are so amazing and very refreshing!
I never really understood why the term hobbyists is used also? Is it really a hobby for most guys who see escorts? Maybe that Word gets used because some hobbies have an addictive nature. As stated, each guy might have very different reasons for seeing escorts. I remember A few years ago, one guy stating on a similar thread, it was his only way of fucking younger women. He got a rush from seeing young women. he was married and with kids. Some use escorts to fulfill a certain fetish or fantasy that they could never fulfill with their partner. Worlds “ oldest profession”?? Has been there for all types of reasons.and it didn’t start yesterday.
I just think someone came up with the term « hobby » because service seeker or client was to direct in the early days of these kind of forums. Also it’s a good term when you can’t face the facts of what it really is ... a bit like « aficionado » for cigar smokers or « tasting wines » to cover the facts that smoking is bad and tasting wines every day makes you an alcoholic ...
Exactly ! Fetishes don’t work with partners i find! Its best to find a provider!
My point exactly, it's not a hobby and honestly in my opinion ''wanting to fuck young women'' isn't a need lol. I don't personally feel the need to fuck very young women or men, maybe because I don't objectify these people. I also disagree that hobbies generally have an addictive nature, except maybe for video games, but most people who play video games aren't addicted to them.
I don't think seeing escorts necessarily make you a sex addict tho. But I see your point, someone who has an unhealthy way of seeking services from escorts may use that term to avoid facing the issues behind their behavior.
A lot of people explore their fetishes with their partners or fwb.. But I do agree that a SP who can provide a certain fetish can fulfill the need of someone who doesn't feel sexually satisfied in their relationship.
i know of many that cannot even get regular sex so fetishes are out of the question plus you gotta be a fetish guy!
I have a pissing fetish! its so hot when a female does that! glad i took the plunge
Like golden shower sort of thing or what specifically?
I've NEVER had anyone inquire about this..
That is actually pretty common hehe
Yes! Its such a personal thing when a woman does it and a privilege ! its my fav!
It's pretty much window dressing, and hobbyist doesn't really mean anything special or interesting in and of itself. It's just one of the many words that men use instead of calling themselves "johns". Using pooner or monger is the same thing. Monger is generally a more used term elsewhere and people in Montreal seem to prefer to use "hobbyist" and "hobby". It's to avoid using "john" which has negative connotations to men who pay for sex, even though it means the same thing. The same is true for men here normally using the word SP instead of using other words with more negative associations. It's just a form of politenesss within the community. Internationally some men and women like to use terms that to indicate they're not full time either partakers or sellers (jinetera for women in Cuba is an example) which to me just seems like rationalizing, but again it's just social lubricant. I personally don't like either "hobbyist" or "hobby" and tend to use "monger" instead, but that's more just habit and personal preference than anything else. I do use hobby and hobbyist here occasionally just because it's the locally accepted term.
why is john more derogatory than hobbyist lol
just say client
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