Falling in love with your SP/MP

[mysiteonly]

Some gals will use emotion to get max dollars and gifts from clients. Sad but true. You really need to fully understand the situation. If she likes you will she see you off the clock. Does she ever not charge you. Does she text you and ask you to come over and chill.

 

[Aspirine]

Does she text you and ask you to come over and chill.

Yes, I can confirm that this can happen and still does

 

[Fradi]

Ok this happened, so what, how is this different than the many civilian horror stories I am sure many of you can tell after all there is a reason you are on this board.
Yes it must be more difficult to date an SP the stigma of her profession and the male ego of knowing how many people she has slept with can not be easy to handle that is the main reason, not because she is different, she has the same dreams, same wishes and same feelings as any other woman and deserves the same love and affection.

 

[Batista Mason]

Having just been in such a relationship for 4 years which ended very badly and with merbites telling me don't go there, I would say avoid falling in love with SP/MP like STD! Of course, I didn't listen. As one merbite cautioned me, treat the hobby as a business transaction. I tried to initially but then just could not resist. I repeatedly put up my token resistance. I would say for a small fortune, I got the real GFE experience, but not necessarily in a good way. The way I saw my SP "girlfriend" reacting to me was the more I spend on her, the more I love her. In the end, after I gave her a "loan" of 20k, she disappeared and cut me off. Should have seen that coming, right? At that point, I realize if I didn't give her the loan, she'll leave right away. If I give her the loan, she might stay a bit longer (in the end, it was not much longer). You can say, stupid is as stupid does. Don't be stupid! I have heard stories where SPs and clients have gotten married and sailed off into the sunset. Those are rare cases.

I can relate to that... I just wanted to help one I been seeing for 2 years and we started hanged out outside of sessions (although it was only after I gave the money). I lend her 2500$ to help her family situation... only for her to move to another city (to be with said family), no longer responding my messages after 1~2 months of messaging each others (last contact was July 19). The further I do my research by talking with her co-workers and friends, the more it point that her family situation was not real and she most likely used my money to move out of Montreal...

In my case, I did my best to not fall in love with her, she even told me not to in our early time we met. But she made me feel like we became real friends who can talk about all the bad things going on in our life and we help each others as friends...

Before anyone ask me who it is via PM. I am not going to answer since I am trying to solve this privately.

 

[mysiteonly]

Batista this sad to hear, but thats why I think keeping it business transaction is best. Some gals just take advantage sad but true.

 

[EagerBeaver]

Batista Mason,

A few years ago I lent $2000 to an SA girl so she could buy a car. The difference from you is I did not really expect to get the money back and mentally parted ways with it, but I did hope to get some sexual favors as repayment instead. It did not happen. My motivation was not love, but wanting to fuck her, which never happened.

 

[Fradi]

JH,

In the civilian world people get totally destroyed financially for thousands, hundreds of thousands and millions
Sometimes it is by wives girlfriends people you have lived with and trusted half your life not just a short fling.

Getting screwed not to your liking is not exclusive to an SP and yes 20k is not a trivial amount although some in the civilian world would laugh at how easy you were let off.
Perhaps you are better off she only stayed 1 month.

 

[EagerBeaver]

I think we can summarize by saying the big money transfers really never end well. As the Beatles once sang in a song that very much resonates with this discussion:

 

[chowzilla]

@Fradi Granted what you say is true, I can't speak for other people. If I weren't dealing with a SP, the money involved would be 10X less. Perhaps you are right that she was better off leaving in a month. We already had 2-3 small incidents of friction as soon as the money got transferred. In the past, this kind of thing is only once a year.

For me, I've been manipulated for money more by my civilian girlfriends lol (granted I was picking them poorly). SPs, after being screwed once, I learned to set ground rules, which I find SPs to be more open about because they are business women.

I'm just very curious, how you lasted 4 years with her. Were you that emotionally invested? that you were blinded by the red flags; Or did you make peace with the fact that she was money oriented, and it was only at the end that she cold bloodedly ran away with your 20k
(Im not judging, I'm just curious what kept you in it for so long)

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

About 35 years ago I was living with a bartender, she would point out girls at the club that were regulars who basically drank for free and tried to get as much money as possible out of men. These people are everywhere, they know they have pussy power. Once visiting her at work a girl sat beside me and asked if I wanted to buy her a drink, I asked if she would just prefer cash ( been sarcastic for a long time ) and she left.....

 

[EagerBeaver]

Jh000, it doesn't suck that she disappeared, she did you a favor. She was a leech. Leeches suck the blood out of you. You need your blood man. And your money. You can go on SA and bang a zillion girls with the money you spent on one leech.

 

[Fradi]

@EagerBeaver Unfortunately that's the ugly truth. Everything involves money. Even wives/gfs want gifts from you. You don't spend big on her, you don't love her. That's what they say. We have to pay for sex, one way or another. With professionals, it is a purely pay for play. Then, you cross the line, like me (or as wanted by the OP), everything is blurred.

No, again I will have to disagree not all wives girlfriends want gifts from you and not all are gold diggers and no you don’t always end up paying for sex one way or another.
Not all women are out to fleece you there are plenty that enjoy sex and want to be loved and will return that ten fold if they feel you are in love with them and you are the one they want to spend their life with.
I will always say it is easy to fall in love, staying in love is the difficult part but when you find the right woman it is magical and nothing can compare.

 

[Batista Mason]

@Batista Mason: Sorry to hear you are in the same boat. Take this as a consolation. I lost way more than you. Everyone says keeps this as a business transaction...then the right girl (or the wrong girl depending on how you look at it) comes along, you throw your rules out the window, hoping things will be different. You must have realized even at the beginning, there is a chance she won't repay the loan.

I did know there was a risk of no money return... she never asked for help or money before, it really sounded like the pandemic affected her and her finally texting me for the first time, that sounded like her last resort. I honestly don't care about my 2500$. I am just disappointed in her as an person, as she is a single mother of 2 kids, she has a responsibility and she do this to me... and as I said, I did some research and learned she owe money to other people...

I actually planned on making a surprise for her when she returns the money to me. If she was honest about our friendship and we kept in contact. I was going to tell her she can keep it to help her family.

Batista Mason,

A few years ago I lent $2000 to an SA girl so she could buy a car. The difference from you is I did not really expect to get the money back and mentally parted ways with it, but I did hope to get some sexual favors as repayment instead. It did not happen. My motivation was not love, but wanting to fuck her, which never happened.

Well, we had an arrangement, until she give me back the money. I was allowed to have FS with her without paying. The only fear would be she move to another city, which is what happened. And as I mentioned above, I don't really care about getting the 2500$ back, I was actually planning to give her a surprise and tell her she can keep it if she was honest about our friendhship and kept contact with me. I am just disappointed in her as an person and she had to do something like this when she was already a very successful popular SP and logically shouldn't be in financial trouble.

 

[bamjay]

@EagerBeaver Unfortunately that's the ugly truth. Everything involves money. Even wives/gfs want gifts from you. You don't spend big on her, you don't love her. That's what they say. We have to pay for sex, one way or another. With professionals, it is a purely pay for play. Then, you cross the line, like me (or as wanted by the OP), everything is blurred.

Yes, 100% this.

I'm sorry to hear what happened to you. I've had a similar experience that ended about 2 years ago with what I thought was just a regular girl who loved me. Turned out she was nothing but a greedy bitch.

Almost all guys learn this the hard way at some point, some get it tougher than others.

Here is some good reading: The Manipulated Man

 

[Robert 21]

Having just been in such a relationship for 4 years which ended very badly and with merbites telling me don't go there, I would say avoid falling in love with SP/MP like STD! Of course, I didn't listen. As one merbite cautioned me, treat the hobby as a business transaction. I tried to initially but then just could not resist. I repeatedly put up my token resistance. I would say for a small fortune, I got the real GFE experience, but not necessarily in a good way. The way I saw my SP "girlfriend" reacting to me was the more I spend on her, the more I love her. In the end, after I gave her a "loan" of 20k, she disappeared and cut me off. Should have seen that coming, right? At that point, I realize if I didn't give her the loan, she'll leave right away. If I give her the loan, she might stay a bit longer (in the end, it was not much longer). You can say, stupid is as stupid does. Don't be stupid! I have heard stories where SPs and clients have gotten married and sailed off into the sunset. Those are rare cases.

THIS Sucks.....

Is This “Person” still a SP?
Where is the Buyer Beware Post?
WTF.....Out this $$$$$!


***CAVEAT EMPTOR***

 

[Christian32]

I think you highly overvalue junior.

I was joking a bit about my junior... certainly that there's other factors why it seems easier to date SP than other girls.

Reading other messages, I realize that their thinking that I am possibly rich is obviously the #1 reason ( I was giving a good tip to the 2 girls that possibly wanted to date me)

 

[The Nature Boy]

U guys need to learn how to lay down the law. I made a deal with a beautiful Brazilian chic to set her up @ my buddies in south Florida while I was in town. All she had to do is bring me fuckin açaí berries from Rio. I made it clear she wouldn’t get paid until I got the berries. She was beautiful, all natty, and the sweetest thing. Man could she dance. I told her before I left Rio how I’m looking forward to seeing her in Miami in a few weeks and how much fun we r gonna have making fresh breakfast blends. I didn’t even give a shit about the sex. But I let her know I wasn’t dickin around about the açaí berries. She saw just by how I treated her In Rio how good I could be to her. Even told her “Gabby, I’m gonna treat you like the queen that you are. But I’m only gonna say this once cause I say it to every girl when it comes to edible goods, don’t fuck with me, don’t you dare ever fuck with me.”

Anywhoo, she came text me from airport, I asked about the berries and she was like “wtf, r u for real?!?!” And I sent her the link to the Fort Lauderdale shuttle where she could take a charter back the next day to rio.

My buddy ended up picking her up sadly, but no $ lost by me.

 

[chowzilla]

@chowzilla I am sorry you are in the same boat too. Hope you didn't lose too much money.

To answer your question, I was both emotionally and financially invested. I spent more than 120k per year on her (including gifts/trips). The sex got better and better (provided I can get her in the mood, this has gotten harder and harder in the last 1.5 years). I get to do what most hobbyists dream of with SPs. I didn't force her or coerce her but she offered it freely (didn't require more money). I am not sure I am allowed to say here.

I saw the red flags. I even tabulated my own data analytics. The last minute cancellations/re-scheduling has gotten more and more severe in 2019 and this year. Like I said, she always needed lube after the cancelations/re-scheduling. Whereas, if I didn't get cancel, there is no lube required. I wasn't really blinded by the red flags but chose to look the other way. On some level, I chose to believe she loved me (and/or my money). The way she looked at me, I felt they she did (or at least in some way) or she's a good actress.

I definitely knew she was money oriented. She grew up very poor and sometimes had nothing to eat. I was hoping to enjoy this relationship (if you can call it that) for as long as possible. The loan is a small fraction of what I spent on her but it sucks she disappeared soon after getting it.

At the time, the money i lost was almost everything I had, but luckily after that I got my shit together, got better jobs, better salaries, and was forced to be more financially aware/responsible. My best friend whose in this hobby as well, definitely helped me turn my situation around, despite already being quite experienced in the hobby, he taught me how to not be attached to another object by an incline plane wrapped helically around an axis. SCREWED

I'm glad your losses weren't that much of a detriment to you and you weren't too emotionally scarred because you weren't ignorant.

Would you try again? Now that you know what you did wrong?

 

[chowzilla]

U guys need to learn how to lay down the law. I made a deal with a beautiful Brazilian chic to set her up @ my buddies in south Florida while I was in town. All she had to do is bring me fuckin açaí berries from Rio. I made it clear she wouldn’t get paid until I got the berries. She was beautiful, all natty, and the sweetest thing. Man could she dance. I told her before I left Rio how I’m looking forward to seeing her in Miami in a few weeks and how much fun we r gonna have making fresh breakfast blends. I didn’t even give a shit about the sex. But I let her know I wasn’t dickin around about the açaí berries. She saw just by how I treated her In Rio how good I could be to her. Even told her “Gabby, I’m gonna treat you like the queen that you are. But I’m only gonna say this once cause I say it to every girl when it comes to edible goods, don’t fuck with me, don’t you dare ever fuck with me.”

Anywhoo, she came text me from airport, I asked about the berries and she was like “wtf, r u for real?!?!” And I sent her the link to the Fort Lauderdale shuttle where she could take a charter back the next day to rio.

My buddy ended up picking her up sadly, but no $ lost by me.

guys learn from this attitude. This is the right way to stand your ground, dont let yourself get walked over. An arrangement, relationship works both ways.

 

[EagerBeaver]

dont let yourself get walked over.

It's called being pussywhipped. Every guy who gets pussywhipped allows it to happen to himself. In any arrangement that works, just like in any relationship that works, there has to be a 2 way street with each party staying in their lane. When someone does not stay in their lane, you do not let them keep driving. Because an accident is going to happen. And as we can see, there have been some car crashes described in this thread.