Ask us anything part 3

[Rebaynia]

Boundaries

First, a little background. I grew up in an environment where I didn't develop healthy boundaries. Today, I realize that I need to develop them in order to have more fulfilling relationships, and I'm actively working on myself to do so.

It took me a few days, but I read all the "Ask us anything" threads (yes, I'm very curious by nature and I have a lot of free time). I'd first like to congratulate all those who generously answered the questions. I noticed on a few occasions that some of you responded firmly and with impressive tact to inappropriate questions. These answers, while not being mean or aggressive toward the author, were nonetheless clear about the boundaries that shouldn't be crossed.

So my question is how did you develop this ability to express your boundaries with such class? I'd appreciate any advice that could potentially help me on my journey.

A natural talent? Work on yourself with reading or professionals? Out of obligation because there are too many morons? (If it's following traumatic experiences, I'm sorry it happened to you, my intention is not to make you relive them / move on to the next question.)

I'm not sure about others, but my diplomatic skills became fine tuned while playing pvp games. When part of the game is attacking other players, you can easily end up with a troll who ruins the game for you if you respond in a negative way.

I learnt to be diplomatic in games to not infuriate trolls to ruin the games for myself. When you can appease the trolls, you have an ally others don't want to mess with. I became my peaceful guilds PR rep to deal with adversary guilds.

 

[LeDodo]

How do you deal with your meal with clients weird hours during lunch or dinner? Like you might get a client for few hours or multiple clients in a row in the middle of meal.
You just go with the flow/bookings and bear until free?

 

[jeffmathers]

Some people just can’t handle a difference of opinion. They immediately jump to assuming others are filled with hatred or anger lmao. Makes no sense. Especially when you ask for public input, but then try to control what people are allowed to say. What’s the point of asking if you're going to decide for them?

The funny thing is you literally retweet providers advertising social time.

 

[Valentina Amante]

The funny thing is you literally retweet providers advertising social time.

? I retweet providers yes? Why are you continuing ?. Just sucking up to SPs here get a life. I don’t have a problem with social time - I even offer it but I don’t make it front and center of my business and impose it onto clients. If you actually read lmao.

 

[LC18]

How do you deal with your meal with clients weird hours during lunch or dinner? Like you might get a client for few hours or multiple clients in a row in the middle of meal.
You just go with the flow/bookings and bear until free?

If it’s a multi hours around meal time, clients usually bring food. Or I simply reschedule at a more convenient time

 

[Giselle Montreal]

How do you deal with your meal with clients weird hours during lunch or dinner? Like you might get a client for few hours or multiple clients in a row in the middle of meal.
You just go with the flow/bookings and bear until free?

Why don't I understand the question?

 

[LeDodo]

Why don't I understand the question?

Example: you got 3 times 1h booking from 11:30 with say 30 minutes break/cleanup in between. So you might be done at 4pm.

I'm such case you:
- Have your lunch before
- Have your lunch after
- don't entertain such rush schedule

 

[Julia Sky]

How do you deal with your meal with clients weird hours during lunch or dinner? Like you might get a client for few hours or multiple clients in a row in the middle of meal.
You just go with the flow/bookings and bear until free?

I dont have an eating schedule to begin with. I eat when I'm hungry and sometimes that means a 3pm breakfast, hahaha

If I have an appointment and happen to be hungry at that time I will eat right after. But I typically dont see several clients a day so I have plenty of time to eat when my body wants me to eat.

If I have a multi hour those clients typically don't mind bringing a snack or getting food delivered during the date. I never asked but i mention being hungry and they offer haha

 

[Giselle Montreal]

Example: you got 3 times 1h booking from 11:30 with say 30 minutes break/cleanup in between. So you might be done at 4pm.

I'm such case you:
- Have your lunch before
- Have your lunch after
- don't entertain such rush schedule

I will probably eat before and after, but as Lena says, clients often bring little things to nibble on so I never go hungry! What I was doing when I had more shorter meetings, or on tours, it that I often kept protein bars at the incall to have just a few bites in between clients, it helped me replenish my energy.

 

[UncleBob]

J'ai une question mais j'vais y aller en français, je me sens paresseux ce soir à tenter de traduire ça...
Je ne sais pas si ça déjà été couvert dans d'autres posts, je ne vais pas me taper 2500 posts certains et le part 1 et 2 lol...

Est-ce que ça vous arrive les filles de devoir recadrer certains clients pour qui le GFE monte à la tête? Clients qui deviennent un peu trop amoureux, deviennent même stalker etc?
Comment vous y prenez vous?
Et à quelle moment de la relation SP/Client aller vous faire le recadrage?

Exemple:
Une indy HDH il y a quelques années, m'a déjà raconter comment un de ces clients fortunés venait à l'occasion à MTL, qui la bookait 2hres à 400$/hre avec un tip de 400 et sans parlé des divers cadeaux, bijoux etc, donc ce client après plusieurs "date$" voulait emménagés avec elle, la marié, fonder une famille...
Et elle racontait que les $$$ faisait qu'elle laissait entrevoir des peut-être sans dire ni oui ni non, étirait la sauce quoi pcq client était gentil et payant mais elle avait déjà quelqu'un dans sa vie dont elle ne parlait pas à ces clients, car le GFE c'est du rêve, un jeu de rôle, et pour que ça aille l'air plausible, faut pas que la fille se ventent d'avoir un BF déjà lol...
Anyway, donc elle a profité le plus possible de ce client mais éventuellement, il a fallu qu'elle y mette un terme...
Je n'ai jamais su comment c'est passé le moment du pétage de la balloune du client...

J'ai aussi déjà entendu des histoires de clients qui prenait des initiatives sans en parler à la fille avant, comme aller voir une fille directement chez elle pour lui portez des fleurs alors qu'elle était en pleine rencontre avec ses parents... etc...