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Staying single for the rest of your life?

Rebaynia

Well-Known Member
Oct 7, 2022
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Montreal
I would think, you find group activities of things you like to do instead of just doing it alone, and see if threw making friendships while doing these activities someone might just be compatible.

I have never known a successful meetup at a bar to find a relationship. Unless your the type of person who likes going out to bars on the regular. I've only known then to be hookup locations, not places to find a relationship.

Depending what age you are, and are looking to connect with, there are community events and centers everywhere that offer an array of things that can be done. This is an active city, not a small town with nothing to do.
 

Fradi

Well-Known Member
Apr 9, 2019
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Around the corner
It really depends on individual circumstances.
I was married for over 35 years to the woman of my dreams, who I lost to cancer 11 years ago.
There is really nothing in life that compares to being in love with a woman who shares your love, your life, and who you have a family with.
I have tried going out with a few women, one in particular who I knew well who also lost her husband a while back, but found that it would always end with a comparison that no other woman would be able to live up to.
I am not really interested in dating or a relationship as I have realized it won’t work, most women in my age bracket I don’t find attractive, they come with a shit load of baggage, I am not interested in dealing with their family or being their financial benefactor and to pick up the pieces of a life they have screwed up.
I am fine with my life, I see my children and grandchildren often during the week they live walking distance from me, I have my friends that I play golf with, see socially go often on vacations that I take my family on.
I have been seeing my ATF for a number of years now, we are friends she is not only gorgeous but an amazingly kind and nice young lady I also see another young lady occasionally so for me that is enough, no commitments, no baggage, just fun with ladies that I like and always look forward to see.
 

wtvmark

Member
Aug 28, 2022
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I've tired doing the event things like saying events. Singles nights. Took some classes. Improve, dance, yoga, various fitness and activities.
You say hi to someone they look like a deer in headlights. Even if it's just to make conversation. At dance classes I ended up quitting cause I couldn't find a practice partner.
And anytime I have managed to get a date, they just want someone to take them out but aren't looking.
I'd rather go to the dentist for a root canal then do this anymore.
 

maymay

Active Member
Sep 10, 2024
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I've tired doing the event things like saying events. Singles nights. Took some classes. Improve, dance, yoga, various fitness and activities.
You say hi to someone they look like a deer in headlights. Even if it's just to make conversation. At dance classes I ended up quitting cause I couldn't find a practice partner.
And anytime I have managed to get a date, they just want someone to take them out but aren't looking.
I'd rather go to the dentist for a root canal then do this anymore.
I joined a walking group at one point, the main issue today i guess is that everything is based on aesthetics and looks. I met a few women in the walking group but they all seemed desperate. Some people cannot live alone and need someone asap.

I also been to singles nights and its always the same the feeling i get those women carry extreme baggage, they look desperate, lots of them try to look younger, but it just doesn't fit them. Like you said it might be best to stay single then be in those relationships.

I would not join a dance class or yoga Pilates because i am not interested in those activities, but i have no doubt about what you are saying when you try to talk to a women.

I had the same thing done to me, they look at you weird.
 

maymay

Active Member
Sep 10, 2024
217
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I would think, you find group activities of things you like to do instead of just doing it alone, and see if threw making friendships while doing these activities someone might just be compatible.

I have never known a successful meetup at a bar to find a relationship. Unless your the type of person who likes going out to bars on the regular. I've only known then to be hookup locations, not places to find a relationship.

Depending what age you are, and are looking to connect with, there are community events and centers everywhere that offer an array of things that can be done. This is an active city, not a small town with nothing to do.
Like wtvmark said it does not work I also tried a few things like this waste of time
 

PSEfreak

Well-Known Member
Feb 3, 2013
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Mtl, Qc
What does "look desperate" mean, what does it look like?
That's a good question.
I assume what he means is a vibe, a energy and a feeling of desperation. You can almost taste it, its in the air around them. You can see it. Men can sense it and the evil one's take advantage of it.
There are a lot of "desperate" woman (and men for that matter) out there. The reasons for the "desperation" vary, but those individuals are absolutely out there.
It's sad.
 
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skarsga

Active Member
Sep 24, 2018
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Nothing wrong with being single and happy.
Nothing wrong with being in some form of relationship and happy.

Solitude and loneliness to me describe the joy and pain of the same experience - being alone.

I think it's rude to judge other people for being or looking desperate, if all they are doing is looking for happiness or to ease their own suffering. I wish them luck!
 
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maymay

Active Member
Sep 10, 2024
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Nothing wrong with being single and happy.
Nothing wrong with being in some form of relationship and happy.

Solitude and loneliness to me describe the joy and pain of the same experience - being alone.

I think it's rude to judge other people for being or looking desperate, if all they are doing is looking for happiness or to ease their own suffering. I wish them luck!
Who is judging i am just saying stop overthinking everything.
 

nico61

Member
Nov 26, 2011
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The existential question is are we as men or women meant to be alone? After being in a relationship for 31years, I am living alone now.
Kids have moved out. I am living a life now that I did not ask for. It was handed to me because of circumstances beyond my control.
My whole life changed after my wife’s death.
Everything that I did as a couple went 360.
It was a mental, physical impact I was never prepared for. The impact of social media has changed men and women’s thinking and outlook. It’s turned us into a colder disposable society. Honestly, I think after talking and going on a few dates with some women. Some feel they don’t need a man anymore.
that’s what I’m experiencing in the after 50 age group.
 

MCTJ

Well-Known Member
Jun 24, 2017
777
1,536
93
The existential question is are we as men or women meant to be alone?
Short answer: no.

I find interesting to have read over the years stories of "older" clients, who, after having lost their wives of many years, have found some form of satisfaction or even happiness using escort services.

My reading of the situation regarding younger habitual clients (less than 35) is that the picture is much darker. We are the products of parental divorce or broken families, in many cases (the same can probably be said of the majority of escorts). Our sexual brains have been messed up by free HD porn. Our relational brains have been confused by dating apps (which I am told people are finally getting.fed up with)

I will not share all the details of my personal story here, but I have been single all my life and I am not happy.

The key to happiness in life is meaningful, high quality relationships.

Plot twist: is happiness in life that important? That's another existential question. For more information, ask Victor Frankl.
 
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skarsga

Active Member
Sep 24, 2018
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Not any of these are questions that have a simple or set answer. Some people meant to be alone and happy, some alone and miserable, etc.

Everyone is built differently, therefore the key to happiness for each person will be different to some extent.
 
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Enjoying life

Member
Dec 2, 2024
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Not any of these are questions that have a simple or set answer. Some people meant to be alone and happy, some alone and miserable, etc.

Everyone is built differently, therefore the key to happiness for each person will be different to some extent.
There needs to be more appreciation for others I find!
 

masterfreak

Well-Known Member
Sep 1, 2018
153
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Apprivoiser la solitude en vieillissant me semble un avenue inévitable
Les relations amoureuses sont très complexes et compliqué de nos jours
Les expériences de vie sont des apprentissages pour nous permettre de savoir ce qu'on aime et où veut on investir notre énergie
Certain on le bonheur de rencontrer une autre personne qui va combler tous leurs besoins
Malheureusement pour moi j'ai pas encore réussi à trouver cette âme soeur
Chaque personne change dans son parcours de vie
L'amoureuse que je rencontre aujourd'hui ne sera pas la même dans 5 10 15 ans moi pareillement
Les intérêts changent l'apparence et les corps aussi
La complexité des relations amoureuses est un obstacle important pour plusieurs solitaires endurcis
Tous les être humains ont eu le coeur brisé
Pour plusieurs la confiance en l'amour est ébranlé à jamais
Ouvrir son coeur malgré les blessures est un aspect essentiel pour avoir l'espoir d'y croire
Apprendre à s'aimer soi-même est aussi le travail d'une vie
Je vous souhaite à tous de trouver cette être chère à moi aussi.
 
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